Dozing polar bear, Indianapolis Zoo

Wednesday, January 09, 2008

With love to Riyadh

You tried so hard.

First you arrived via the google query "russia vuck," which led you here. It appears -- ahem -- that you and The Kid were both laboring under the same misapprehension as to that word. Seeing nothing but a description of Mr. T's sink installation activities, you decided to take a more direct approach, searching the entire blog for the word "sexy."

You have got to be kidding me. No, seriously. This blog?

Now if you were more creative -- or maybe more thoroughly versed in English, I don't know -- you might have tried "mountain boobs" like the guy from Scotland last week. That would have landed you here. Not exactly what you were looking for, but hey -- at least that post had the actual word.

Still not finding what you needed, you tried one last, heroic measure: searching the "videos" tag. I'm guessing that "Bald Cypress", "Snakebird, I love you", and "Paddling the mangroves" all excited you a bit when you first read them, but sadly, I can feel your ultimate disappointment all the way across the globe.

But congratulations anyway. That was the most dogged search for p*rn I think I have ever witnessed. You persevered in the face of truly daunting odds. Some might tell you to just go rent something*, but -- well, it's Riyadh. As if there weren't enough reasons to lighten the hell up a little over there, maybe it would spare me from watching such pathetic displays unfolding in my statcounter.

So I have a better idea. Why don't you just go paddle your mangrove.

6 comments:

Lewis said...

Paddlin' my man-grove....oh, now there's an idea that I've never thought of....and, believe me, I've considered them all! Hope you guys are surviving over there in the snow and looking for the house and all (or are you back in PDX now??) Who knows!

Anonymous said...

Mountain Boobs?

Thems must be pretty big!

I remember when so many of us came here looking for Sancho

-Toots-

Trailhead said...

Lewis, we're back in pdx! Just sitting here, paddling our mangroves...

Toots, I couldn't figure out whether he wanted boobs that looked like mountains or mountains that looked like boobs.

Funny you should mention Sancho. More than 700 people from the UK and elsewhere in Europe looking for Sancho today. It aired on the BBC, apparently.

Anonymous said...

"Funny you should mention Sancho. More than 700 people from the UK and elsewhere in Europe looking for Sancho today. It aired on the BBC, apparently."

I Know I saw some new comments on Sancho today.

Poor little Bugger. So many people care about him he really reached a lot of people. If he did die I guess it was not in vein.

Boobs that look like mountains? Kinda rough and with ridges. Have you ever seen “everything you ever wanted to know about Sex” I think It was called? A Woody Allen movie. But they had this monstrous breast wobbling around these hills and then they had to Catch it with a big bra!

-Toots-

Trailhead said...

Toots, I just have to say I'm damn glad you stuck around from the Sancho days. You never write a boring comment.

Anonymous said...

No Boring.. just silly.. BIG fan of silly

Many Tankies to you
-Toots-